Hi I don’t read this type of thing but I can see you have the bones of a good book. The descriptions are good but In my limited experience and from a readers perspective I would have liked more dialogue up front and more Show than tell. Hope this helps.
Thanks Debbie, I appreciate you taking the time to read it, especially as it's not your type of fiction. I'll take your feedback on board, always good to know a reader's perspective! I personally am not a big fan of dialogue, I usually flick through books in the shops to see if there a big swathes of it and if so, I won't buy - but I'm probably strange in that aspect. I certainly agree with you and Donna that it's far too slow at the start of the Chapter, so some up front dialogue should fix that 😊