Comment to 'Feedback request - Contemporary Fantasy opening chapters'
  • Hey Lynn! Thanks for submitting your work. I hate to say it, but I'm with Rick n Julie, I stopped reading too. The first paragraph had me hooked, then you went on to mention she'd been dead for years and that just sorta killed it for me. I like Julie's suggestion, cut to the chase right away. But the writing is really good, I think it has great potential. I think for the start, just focus on what you want to tell/show the reader and just do it as that. Don't let this bring you down, I think the story could end up being quite good!

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    • Thanks for the encouragement, Sibo! I'll revise and see where that takes me. Thanks so much for reading

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