Julie B

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Julie B Discussions
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Here's my first attempt at a query letter. It's for a children's book, but is it too short? I need t…
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  •  · That could be it. 😂
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You hear a lot about vanity publishing houses and to steer clear of them, but I had no idea that we …
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  •  · Right?😂 We'd make more than getting our book published for sure!
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Not my genre but I found it so interesting, I wanted to share. For all Fantasy, Science Fiction, and…
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  •  · Thanks. That would be terrific.
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I have a character arc that goes from being afraid to brave but this makes my MC too passive. To cor…
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  •  · In that case I'm definitely selling it to you, or someone is.My given life is in three novels.  The …
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I have to share this! I just watched a Tedx talk with Brian Weisfeld, author of The Startup Squad (m…
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Have you ever felt proud of something you wrote only to find out it was terrible? Rewriting the umpt…
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Hi! So I've reread your PB and I have a few suggestions. 

I don't write PB's, but I know that the pictures need to do half the work. You need to leave a little more unsaid, that the pictures will explain, freeing up some precious words to dedicate elsewhere. Right now your words are leaving nothing for the pictures to say; for example, "Grandma and Grandpa were packing" can be shown in the picture instead.

Most picture books have 32 pages (15 double-page spreads plus 2 single pages). It’s helpful to create an actual dummy. Fold normal sheets of paper in half and put a rubber band around the middle fold line to make a book.

Print out your manuscript and divide the text into 15 parts. Cut and paste them into the book dummy you created, one part per double-page spread. Flip through each page, read your pasted text, and think of an illustration that would go nicely with that particular text, but that brings something new to the story.

If you do this, I think you'll find that you need to switch around your text. I'd start the first sentence with Korra, instead of the grandparents. Children want to know right away who the book is about. I'll give it a try, just to show you what I mean.

On Friday, Korra and Grandma made delicious treats using berries, leaves, and nuts. (pic shows something of the setting of your story. Are they in a house? forest?)

On Saturday, Korra and Grandpa hopped sky-high and ran races. (which Korra always won - shown in picture? is it summer, maybe grandpa is hot?)

Today, Grandpa and Grandma Roo had to leave. “Don’t be so glum,” Grandma said to Korra, “we’ll be back soon.”

“Cheer up,” said Grandpa, and did one giant jump. 

 “I am cheered up,” said Korra, but he didn’t smile. (picture shows grandparents packing? Korra hopping away?)

The picture ideas you come up with will only be written suggestions when you sub for traditional publishing and won't be up to you but will help improve your story.

Just my thoughts, take what makes sense to you and leave the rest. Hope this helps!

This is really cute, Anjilize. It's not at all didactic or boring! Your plot is pretty good and you've stuck to the rule of three which is great, but I think it still needs work. As soon as I have time, I'll take a better look at it and get back to you with some suggestions.

Hi! Would love to see it! You can post it on the children's group or PM me.

Congratulations, Holly! At least open one of your special bottles of wine tonight!

Welcome to Townhouse, Anjali! Everyone is really helpful here.

I feel like a kid in the room with the adults speaking over my head with you two! I just blow you a raspberry - pbbbt!!

The fun explanation is that Townhouse has its very own poltergeist. But if you prefer the boring version, the platform system has glitches. We're getting a new one soon, hang in there!

Congratulations Ben! How exciting! What's the name of your book?

Hi Amanda, welcome to Townhouse! Thank you for your encouragement and advice, it's good to know that you liked both the query and synopsis. They are so hard to get right. How fun that we're both applying to WriteMentor! Good luck to you too!

Reams? Oh my, I'm afraid to look.😅 P.S Good thing you told me. I'm not getting any notices or emails for private messages...what's up with that?

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